First Date Purpose – Why What You Talk About Matters

What to talk about on your first date can be nerve wracking if you want to make a good impression. Once you understand the purpose of a first date, however, the rest is easy. Let’s start with defining the purpose of the first date.

First dates are opportunities to get to know one another in a positive way. You talk, laugh, and feel each other out. You determine if there is chemistry. If you are attracted to this man it’s imperative that he gets positive feelings about you. Make sure your conversation is all POSITIVE. Now is not the time to complain about ANYTHING!

First date conversations should focus on light topics. The weather, current events, interesting projects you’re working on, etc. Leave talk of problems with your ex or your bad supervisor, unruly kids, or financial problems locked in the closet at home. Have fun. Make him feel happy to be around you. And at the conclusion of the date, be sure to “thank him with a big smile.”

And that’s it – NOTHING ELSE.

First dates are just introductions to experience positive vibes – to determine if there is any interest and excitement between you. If he’s interested, he will let you know. If you’re interested you will accept his attention. And guess who pays for these dates? He does!

What to talk about on your first date is as simple as just stated. You’re feeling each other out to see if there is any basis for another date; whether you like each other enough, whether there is basis enough to progressively build a relationship together.

In other words, what you’re doing at this point is evaluating whether there is chemistry enough to become friends. Because becoming friends is the first step to developing true love between couples.

What you want to do on this first date is to make him laugh. Make him feel good about being in your presence. Make him smile so that he wants to get to know more about you. Talk about positive things because you’re building a foundation of good vibes between the two of you.

At a later stage in the dating process, you can begin to talk about the not so pleasant side of life: A fight with your boss; babysitting problems; what a jerk your ex is; financial problems; health problems, etc. He certainly doesn’t need to hear these negatives on your first date. If you do, chances are he will breathe a sigh of relief when the date is over and never call again.

On the other hand, if the evening goes well, he’ll likely ask you out again. But be cautious, the first date actually could be first several dates that you’re feeling each other out, so take it slow.

And above all else DO NOT have sex at this stage of dating. If you are intimate before he gets to know you and value you as someone special, he’ll act like a typical man who’s won the prize (your sex) on the first pass and will not see the value of pursuing you further, because in his mind, you were easy and he’s moving on.

So make your first date all positive, fun, filled with interesting first date conversations and you’ll never again have to worry about what to talk about on your first date. Your next step is to learn how to build on the successful first date to lead to a long-term loving relationship.



Source by Donna Patterson

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